My Body Needs Me!

Life has been hectic these past few months. For a while the boy was doing soccer and baseball simultaneously! We are finally wrapping up baseball (1 more game until “fall ball”).

I have once again put my own needs on the back burner though. I haven’t had time to do my research on hashimotos, and nearly gave up all together on watching gluten and dairy consumption. I have been taking my thyroid medicine, and my doc says my thyroid hormone is “in the normal” again.

I know better though. I still feel run down, have gained 5 lbs (dispite counting calories and increasing my active time), am struggling with inflammation, and still haven’t been able to normalize my monthly menstrual cycle. These are all markers for elevated thyroid antibodies and adrenal stress. As I type this, I know I should be going to bed. It’s 1040 and who knows how long I will have the bed to myself before I have a little toddler vying for some space.

My resolution is to give myself a break. I will not get better until I start putting the focus on my own needs. Maybe I need to take an extra hour off of work for a nap during the week. I know I need to say no to more commitments, and turn off the TV sooner. I think i may higher a cleaning service a few times a month. Somethings gotta give!

The thyroid curse 

I have a sluggish thyroid my doctor says. He put me on the most popularly prescribed medicen in the United States: levothyroxine. I started taking it in February. At my 6 week blood draw my THE was back in the “normal” range so I’m good right? 

By conventional medicine standards I’m good. I should just leave it at that right? “Take a pill everyday to replace your interactive thyroid hormones. Some day we may need to up your dose but you’re good for now Mrs. Phoenix.” 


If I didn’t know better I would take that diagnosis as gospel, but I am a medical professional. When I find out about a problem I start researching. And low and behold there is more, so much more to my diagnosis than just taking a pill. It turns out that I likely have hashimotos thyroiditis. It’s an autoimmune disease that 95% of all hypothyroid patients end up with. Autoimmune diseases kill your body slowly over time. And they are usually caused by external factors. 

I know I can control what I expose my body to, so I am confident I can get to the roof of this illness. I’ve discovered an amazing authority for help pointing myself right, and I’m hoping my readers may be able to use my insights as I work through this journey to improve their quality of life too.

If you are interested in learning more about hashimotos thyroiditis, or graves disease, or hypo/hyperthyroidism, I encourage you to check into the work of Izabella Wentz PharmD FASCP. I’m not being paid to promote her work, and having met her personally, I’ve just invested some time in listening and reading her stuff, and it’s good! 


I won an award. It’s awesome. I deserve it too I think. But I sure have a hard time believing that I am worthy of such an honor.

 I have worked very hard to be successful at my job. I have a passion for everything optometric, and always want to no know more and help more. 

Why is it so hard for me to give myself the honor and respect? To bask in the glory of this great honor? Today, in our company office meeting I was honorably mentioned for the award. Dang it! My reply wasn’t the thank-you speech it should have been. Instead, I discounted everything publicly. I told my peers that I thought I won by default because of lack of participation from other statewide members. 😶

Tonight, while I was showering (the only quiet time of my day) I started to realize how awful that statement sounded. SOMEONE from my office believed in me enough to nominate me for the honor, and others must have concurred. The fact that I loudly discounted their support and love is disrespectful. Foot in mouth as usual 😖.

I then remembered Tim McGraw’s amazing lyrics from Humble and Kind 

When the dreams you’re dreamin’ come to you
When the work you put in is realized
Let yourself feel the pride but
Always stay humble and kind

So of course, the work on myself continues. I need to allow myself to enjoy the pride of accomplishment, and remember how I got there. 

I think I will write a nice thank you card to my work family. I want them to know I love their support and encouragement.

Christmas Train Trip

On the eve of Christmas eve we were blessed with the opportunity to take a family train trip. It was just a short jaunt through the snowy Black Hills, but it was magical. 

we ate Christmas cookies, drank hot chocolate, visited with Santa and Mrs. Claus, and got magic Christmas bells!

we will always remember this fun time. Happy holidays from the Phoenix clan! 

Growing out of Santa?

Its getting close to the point where our oldest will learn the truth about Santa and Christmas magic. I want to tell him this year, after Christmas, but my husband thinks we should wait. When is the right time to abandon those childhood fantasies?

The reason I want to end the whole Santa mess is because I feel like Alex has developed an attitude of entitlement. When he sat down to write his letter to Santa this year, he started it “Dear Santa, I want…” Something about this whole process really got me fuming. Our family has tried to instill an attitude of gratitude approach to life in general, so to see those words on that paper in his squiggly 3rd grade handwriting really ticked me off. I tried to lead him through a revision of his letter, but it turned into a dictation session, and at the end, the Santa letter was written primarily by yours truely.

I feel like next year should be about sharing the magic with others. With Alex having a little sister, it’s important for him to let her live the Christmas magic. That’s why my husband and I talked about letting him participate in being “Santa” for her. We also talked about making Christmas more about doing charitable acts for others. But my dear husband thinks that we should keep the Santa secret at least one more year, and just not emphasize so much on what the kid wants from Santa. So, will the Santa saga continue through Alex’s 10th year? I’m on the fence.


At what age should children be told the truth about Santa? Is it conditional? What things could I do diffrently to steer clear of the entitlement, greed, and commercialization that sometimes surround the holiday season?

God Spoke to Me Through Meghan Trainor Today

So, I know this is old news, but it made it into my Facebook feed today again. It’s the blog regarding  the dissection of Meghan Trainor’s song All About That Bass and how it degrades skinny girls and condones hate and discrimination. It also brings up Meghan’s less than tasteful comment to press about not having enough guts to be anorexic.

I am not a fan of Meghan, but the nit-picking of the star has been nagging at me for over a year. I feel like God is showing me this post again today as a call to action.

Remember the sermon on the mount? Where Jesus emplores us to stop being hypocritical. He said stop pointing out the “speck” in our brothers eye until we address the plank in our own eye. (Paraphrased).

I feel like society has become obsessed with pointing out prominent people’s problems and picking them apart. I feel society somehow projects perfection onto these individuals who are in the “limelight”. We somehow forget that these individuals are still imperfect humans. Every person has opinions, and sometimes ignorance. None of us are perfect.

This Meghan Trainor thing just reminded me that I need to re-examine my imperfections and let off of other people. I implore my readers to remember that even super stars are humans who make bad choices, and questionable or controversial stands. They are not to be judged by us. They do not need to be hated by us. They answer to God and God alone. Just like you and me. Maybe we should just lay off a bit.


The other day, I came home to a particularly ornery husband. He was giving me crap about housework, and making him sandwiches, and getting him beer etc. This is typical hubby behavior and I usually roll my eyes and laugh along with him, because I know he does genuinely love and appreciate me. That’s why his next comment seemed way out of left (well probably right) field.

He says: “woman we’re getting a divorce.” Just like that. I, of course, gave him a shocked look and my face probably lost all color. He had to be joking. He’s such a turd.

The man was only slightly serious, and I might add that there is a reason to his madness that is probably understandable.

He had some extra time on his day off to read some internet garbage about how a single mother of two children was making more money being unemployed than what she was making working and paying for daycare. Of course, then he decided to analyze our financial situation and come up with a grand scheme to take advantage of our nation’s broken governmental assistance program.

Here it goes: We’re to get a divorce. I’m to get custody of the kids, and he’s going to sign over the house that we purchased last year into my name.He would change his address to his mom’s house, and then we wouldn’t be legally “cohabiting”.  I’m supposed to quit my job in order to take care of the kiddos, and apply for assistance to go to school full time. Of course, all the while we will still maintain our relationship as a couple, just not legally recognized as a married couple.

With these things in place, I stand to make roughly 40 grand annually  (fully funded by our lovely government) to supplement my husband’s (I mean baby daddy’s) income. God Bless America, that’s why our system is broken. If Americans know they can get something for free, and are smart enough, (or lazy enough) to do so, then our hard working citizens are paying for the lazy man’s delight.

I chuckled at my man’s scheme, but with a sigh, and a shake of my head, I can see the truth, and fear that others have acted on this very same plan. Where have the good days gone, when you worked for what you earned, and you were never entitled to anything? What do my children have to look forward to in this crazy future that will be their life? I refuse to raise my children to expect anything more than what they rightfully earn through hard work and dedication. I fear this mindset is a dieing breed though.

I’m not divorcing my husband any time soon. We agreed to those vows, and he’s stuck to me legally and spiritually. But he opened my eyes to the twisted society we are currently living in.